Buildup to being an Exhibitionist-

I originally posted this blog entry on myspace in Sept 06. It got some of my true feelings down at the time so i re-print them here.

It was really only after having been caught jerking off,by friends or roomates that i realized that turned me on sexually. I even let my friend jesse watch me spunk off 5 or 6 times. And once i met a guy on a phone chat line,who came over with his friend. We got naked and had sex,while his "straight" friend watched us.I remember cuming hard as he watched only 2 feet away. When i thought about it later on,i realized it really turned me on,but i wanted to explore it more.

I had been taken to a bathouse for my first time by a roomate at the time. I was really shy at first about being seen naked outside of the showers,and even when i had a room i would lay on the bed with the door open but with my towel still on.After visiting more bathouses and feeling more comfortable, I progressed to playing with myself under the towel,but still not showing. After a few more months,i got up the nerve to lay on the bed in my underwear,but still covering my bulge with my hands or tucking it down. I would get these shivers of excitement,because it was really turning me on! I started buying underwear that would show my big cock off when i was hard,laying on the bed. Then i got more brave and would show off my cock through the underwear rock hard.And then would even walk around in my undies,although not always hard. I got less shy and would sit on the edge of the hot tub,sometimes covering my cock other times hard and showing,but only to hot guys. The next turn on,was to lay on the bed with my underwear off,next to me,my hands over my cock and balls.It took awhile to not cover my balls and eventually show hard to guys i liked. It was around this time that the bathouse Spa Excess here in Toronto,started to have there Friday night naked parties.They really hyped it,and had cool dj's and hot prizes for people who went naked. In order to be in the draws i had to stay naked most of the night.The first time i did it,i was so nervous being totally nude walking around.You had to check in with the guy in the toy store to prove you were nude to be eligible to win dvd players,mp3 players,tv's etc.I walked around with my cock covered by my hands.

I had also started using hair clippers to trim my chest and pubes and ass.I don't have lots of hair,it grows in sparodic on my chest and i have fine blonde hair on my ass. You have to be careful with the trimmer on your bag,as it can pull and cause a cut and blood. I like the feeling of being naked and trimmed! It shows off my cock more too!

At this time i also thought about how much i am turned on by white socks,so i started wearing them as i walked naked at the baths. I also tried wearing a cock ring and loved it,as it keeps me big and hard longer.I prefer the large size rubber cock ring over the leather thicker one with crome snaps.I have both and they each are good in there own way.The rubber one only comes of when u r soft. I started walking around in nothing but white socks and a cock ring.It gave me a thrill each time.Sometimes i will wear a small size white undershirt.I found it stopped me getting nervous thrills if went into the bar and had a beer almost naked. Later at night at Spa Excess,i would walk through the bar area nude and hard,but usually there was no one or only a few guys there. I progressed to standing in the porn lounge jerking off,but still covering myself if i didnt see guys i liked.

My big step lately was at naked night last week. I actually got the guts up to walk around in just socks and in my cock ring but this time i was so horny and had not jerked of in 4 days,so i was super rock hard with my cock pointing up on an angle. I left my room and walked....without covering myself,i felt awesome and sexually thrilled,the place was packed and guys were noticing my big cock all thick and hard! I had noticed a really hot filipino guy with shoulder length hair and a smooth killer bod earlier. We had noticed each other,so it was awesome when i saw him leaning against a wall in a busy area watching guys walk by.We made eye contact and then he noticed i was rock hard and naked! It really excited me when he looked at my cock and smiled,i didnt think i could,but i actually got harder! I walked by him a few times,and he told me i was so hot! I even walked by once with my foreskin pulled almost all the way back,so he could see my big head! I love being watched! We didn't hook up this time...but i know it will happen. I even walked through the bar when it was busy and my cock was still hard! .......so many other hot things to do too.